Mx. Kim and Mr. Chan, who live in a suburb near Toronto, split the June 2022 wedding into multiple parts to reduce overstimulation. First, they chose to do a private elopement with just their photographer, Aisha Keita, and her husband, Maxwell Step, “without the pressure to perform,” said Mx. Kim, of the celebration held at the Good Northern, a waterfront cottage in Ontario. They did their legal paper signing in October 2022 with about a dozen immediate family members, which felt intimate.
In December 2022, they hosted a reception at a queer-run photo and event space in Toronto for about 50 people — the maximum number they felt comfortable with. At the reception, they added a quiet room for decompressing, opted not to have a D.J. in favor of a sound system they could control themselves and skipped the traditional first dance.
“We didn’t want to be the center of attention,” Mx. Kim said.
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